Over 19 years ago, I can remember my mum saying to me, the greatest legacy that I can give you is education. Up till date many parents believe that that is the best inheritance to leave a child; so lots of investment is put into getting their children in good schools and a lot of celebration is made when they come out with good grades. However, what I discover is that good grades don’t guarantee a well paying job.
In this days of global melt down leaving the price of shares crashing, many parents that have invested in stocks as part of the legacy they will leave for their children will be in a state of dilemma now. Coupled with buildings that are brought down to make Lagos a mega city, some of those that got buildings that have been demolish have nothing left. I was in a bus once when the conductor was lamenting that the inheritance his dad left for him had been brought down and his yearly rent (income) has come to an end (he didn’t however mention why the building was pulled down, but that the Lagos state governor had done great injustice to him).
The things that I have mention are good legacies; however, I feel that there are others that our parents didn’t look at that are legacies that they may or may not have bequeathed to their children. That is one reason I feel I should write on this issue so that we the present generation of fathers will learn and become a little better than our fathers. Here are some of the legacies I feel are essential that a father should pass to his children…
A life of dedication to ones religion- The first of all legacies a father should bequeath his children is a life dedicated to the religion he chooses as his own. Many horrid things I would have done in life if not for the practice of the religion my parents uphold from when I was young. We were practically dragged to church and made to join groups; I will never forget my choir days (please don’t get me to sing now).
Every father must not just make their children active in their religion, they also should do the same. Children learn by example more than from been compelled to anything. However, I feel I should add this; parents should avoid their children getting into the extremes of their religion.
If a child don’t have reverence for his Maker from his youth, it’s easy for him/her to turn out wrong in life. I once read of children who inherited million of dollars, yet ended up committing suicide. Give your children sound religion first before giving them cash.
Love their mum- I feel the 2nd legacies every father needs to leave their children is that he loved their mum. I will never forget a saying that I came across once; someone said ‘do your children a favor; love their mum.’ Love is not just ensuring that all of the needs of the family are met; it’s about respecting her in the presence of your children.
The world view of children on how to relate with people and especially the opposite sex starts from the way they see their father relate with their mum. I will never forget the question session of a singles meeting I was a guest minister in. A you lady stood up and said to the whole house that she wasn’t going to allow herself go through hard times with any man because they are not worth it. She had developed a faulty mindset because her dad turns another leaf for the worse for them when he became financially buoyant.
Your children will naturally reflect who you are to their world; if they live seeing you bash their mum (you may think you have a tenable excuse for this), 70% of the times the male ones will also end up bashing their wives.
Relationship with them- The third legacy a father should leave for his children is that he has got to relate with them individually with their different uniqueness. I have met children who have relationship with their dads; they both sit down and talk like buddies with each showing a sense of respect for the other. Such children reflect so much confidence and boldness when relating with people.
Irrespective of your busy schedule as a father, you should find time to relate with your children. The memories of the good times they had with you will keep them going for years to come after you have left the world. Fathers should especially take the time to relate with their daughters so that they can have a world view of what a man should be and how they ought to comport themselves. Least all this rascally guys, sweet talk them into doing what they could have avoided if dad had been not just a father but a friend to them.
I feel that every father should stop a trend that was common in the past; that is a man is called the father of the world, because he is Mr. Nice and Mr. Philanthropist. Yet to his own children, he is but a stranger.
Olufemi Fasanya
08037257479, 08083906405
www.relationship-daddy.blogspot.com
In this days of global melt down leaving the price of shares crashing, many parents that have invested in stocks as part of the legacy they will leave for their children will be in a state of dilemma now. Coupled with buildings that are brought down to make Lagos a mega city, some of those that got buildings that have been demolish have nothing left. I was in a bus once when the conductor was lamenting that the inheritance his dad left for him had been brought down and his yearly rent (income) has come to an end (he didn’t however mention why the building was pulled down, but that the Lagos state governor had done great injustice to him).
The things that I have mention are good legacies; however, I feel that there are others that our parents didn’t look at that are legacies that they may or may not have bequeathed to their children. That is one reason I feel I should write on this issue so that we the present generation of fathers will learn and become a little better than our fathers. Here are some of the legacies I feel are essential that a father should pass to his children…
A life of dedication to ones religion- The first of all legacies a father should bequeath his children is a life dedicated to the religion he chooses as his own. Many horrid things I would have done in life if not for the practice of the religion my parents uphold from when I was young. We were practically dragged to church and made to join groups; I will never forget my choir days (please don’t get me to sing now).
Every father must not just make their children active in their religion, they also should do the same. Children learn by example more than from been compelled to anything. However, I feel I should add this; parents should avoid their children getting into the extremes of their religion.
If a child don’t have reverence for his Maker from his youth, it’s easy for him/her to turn out wrong in life. I once read of children who inherited million of dollars, yet ended up committing suicide. Give your children sound religion first before giving them cash.
Love their mum- I feel the 2nd legacies every father needs to leave their children is that he loved their mum. I will never forget a saying that I came across once; someone said ‘do your children a favor; love their mum.’ Love is not just ensuring that all of the needs of the family are met; it’s about respecting her in the presence of your children.
The world view of children on how to relate with people and especially the opposite sex starts from the way they see their father relate with their mum. I will never forget the question session of a singles meeting I was a guest minister in. A you lady stood up and said to the whole house that she wasn’t going to allow herself go through hard times with any man because they are not worth it. She had developed a faulty mindset because her dad turns another leaf for the worse for them when he became financially buoyant.
Your children will naturally reflect who you are to their world; if they live seeing you bash their mum (you may think you have a tenable excuse for this), 70% of the times the male ones will also end up bashing their wives.
Relationship with them- The third legacy a father should leave for his children is that he has got to relate with them individually with their different uniqueness. I have met children who have relationship with their dads; they both sit down and talk like buddies with each showing a sense of respect for the other. Such children reflect so much confidence and boldness when relating with people.
Irrespective of your busy schedule as a father, you should find time to relate with your children. The memories of the good times they had with you will keep them going for years to come after you have left the world. Fathers should especially take the time to relate with their daughters so that they can have a world view of what a man should be and how they ought to comport themselves. Least all this rascally guys, sweet talk them into doing what they could have avoided if dad had been not just a father but a friend to them.
I feel that every father should stop a trend that was common in the past; that is a man is called the father of the world, because he is Mr. Nice and Mr. Philanthropist. Yet to his own children, he is but a stranger.
Olufemi Fasanya
08037257479, 08083906405
www.relationship-daddy.blogspot.com
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