In last week edition I wrote on the legacies that fathers should essentially leave for their children when they pass on to the other side of no return (death). I wrote on the need to see legacies beyond giving their children qualitative education or leaving behind assets alone because of circumstances that may be beyond their control that can erode them of the benefits we want them to have from it.
Here are some other legacies that I believe that every father should bequeath their children…
Guiding them in the path of purpose- The worse inheritance a father can leave his children is the one that will erode them of the purpose for their creation. There is nothing more terrible than letting your children live in the shadow of your dreams and aspiration for them instead of letting them be all that they can be.
One of the best things that you can do for your children in life is not to interfere into their lives beyond guiding them to be good people by teaching them how to responsibly behave in the world they have found themselves. If we as fathers see ourselves as the custodian of our children rather than their possessor, we will loosen up on the way we impose certain things on them.
I believe that purpose is the reason for creation not just sexual intercourse; if a child will not walk aimlessly in life trying to become what society will want to conform him/her to be, the dad of that child/children have to spend time to closely observe him/her. He should guide his child/children in the path that shows his dominate gifts rather than in paths that will boost his own ego.
Sow good seeds in the lives of people- When I wrote on this column an article tagged your action as a father can affect your children’s future dated march 7th 2009, I didn’t expect the kind of response I got from it. I had people calling and sending me text messages on the reality of that write up; their lives have experience a progression because their father had been responsible enough to sow a seed in the lives of not just their family but on people too. Seeds have a two way harvest; the one who sowed it will reap it and his lineage will also get the harvest of the seeds their parents sowed.
The legacy of favor and good will far outweighs any silver or gold that you may bequeath your children; some children didn’t get a penny after the death of their dad because he had no earthly riches, but got wealthy because the man left a seed of kindness, selflessness, care, respect, etc to people around him.
I feel every father should strive to live this legacy; they should also teach their children to follow in their path because what the society teaches is get all that you can, can all that you can and sit on the can. Every blessing is transferable; if you teach your children how you got the blessing you have, they also can head in that direction and get it to.
Don’t die intestate- I believe that if some dead people can see the havoc the wealth they left behind had caused between their children after their demise, they will turn in pain in their tomb. I have heard horrible events that happen when a man dies without leaving behind a will; some children have lost their lives because they want to get what belongs to them from their father’s property. I know someone that sold all of his parent’s property because his nephews couldn’t challenge him on it after the death of their parents.
A will is a legacy every father should bequeath his children; I don’t care how closely knitted your children are, please leave them a will to protect the unity between them. Be fair in the distribution of what belongs to you; even if you don’t appreciate some of the attitude of any of children, let them have what belongs to them so that they don’t constitute a thong in the flesh for the others.
Here is the story of young man I meant recently which I feel will help in passing his message to fathers that will read it; his name is John. We met when I went as a guest minister in a singles meeting and got talking. One thing led to the other; I asked him about his family and he began telling me a horrid experience him, his mum and sister went through after the death of their dad.
According to him; when his dad died, his family members were nice to the family until he was buried. They then began to share his property amongst themselves, in the end leaving them with nothing of their own. They gave his mum the option to get married to one of his sibling or take care of her children by herself; she chose the 2nd option. His mum had to do all manner of menial work to sustain the family; he could remember the pains his mum had gone.
His dad died intestate and his sibling who should protect the family he left behind became the wolves that devour what he had worked for in his life time.
Olufemi Fasanya
08037257479, 08083906405
www.relationship-daddy.blogspot.com
Here are some other legacies that I believe that every father should bequeath their children…
Guiding them in the path of purpose- The worse inheritance a father can leave his children is the one that will erode them of the purpose for their creation. There is nothing more terrible than letting your children live in the shadow of your dreams and aspiration for them instead of letting them be all that they can be.
One of the best things that you can do for your children in life is not to interfere into their lives beyond guiding them to be good people by teaching them how to responsibly behave in the world they have found themselves. If we as fathers see ourselves as the custodian of our children rather than their possessor, we will loosen up on the way we impose certain things on them.
I believe that purpose is the reason for creation not just sexual intercourse; if a child will not walk aimlessly in life trying to become what society will want to conform him/her to be, the dad of that child/children have to spend time to closely observe him/her. He should guide his child/children in the path that shows his dominate gifts rather than in paths that will boost his own ego.
Sow good seeds in the lives of people- When I wrote on this column an article tagged your action as a father can affect your children’s future dated march 7th 2009, I didn’t expect the kind of response I got from it. I had people calling and sending me text messages on the reality of that write up; their lives have experience a progression because their father had been responsible enough to sow a seed in the lives of not just their family but on people too. Seeds have a two way harvest; the one who sowed it will reap it and his lineage will also get the harvest of the seeds their parents sowed.
The legacy of favor and good will far outweighs any silver or gold that you may bequeath your children; some children didn’t get a penny after the death of their dad because he had no earthly riches, but got wealthy because the man left a seed of kindness, selflessness, care, respect, etc to people around him.
I feel every father should strive to live this legacy; they should also teach their children to follow in their path because what the society teaches is get all that you can, can all that you can and sit on the can. Every blessing is transferable; if you teach your children how you got the blessing you have, they also can head in that direction and get it to.
Don’t die intestate- I believe that if some dead people can see the havoc the wealth they left behind had caused between their children after their demise, they will turn in pain in their tomb. I have heard horrible events that happen when a man dies without leaving behind a will; some children have lost their lives because they want to get what belongs to them from their father’s property. I know someone that sold all of his parent’s property because his nephews couldn’t challenge him on it after the death of their parents.
A will is a legacy every father should bequeath his children; I don’t care how closely knitted your children are, please leave them a will to protect the unity between them. Be fair in the distribution of what belongs to you; even if you don’t appreciate some of the attitude of any of children, let them have what belongs to them so that they don’t constitute a thong in the flesh for the others.
Here is the story of young man I meant recently which I feel will help in passing his message to fathers that will read it; his name is John. We met when I went as a guest minister in a singles meeting and got talking. One thing led to the other; I asked him about his family and he began telling me a horrid experience him, his mum and sister went through after the death of their dad.
According to him; when his dad died, his family members were nice to the family until he was buried. They then began to share his property amongst themselves, in the end leaving them with nothing of their own. They gave his mum the option to get married to one of his sibling or take care of her children by herself; she chose the 2nd option. His mum had to do all manner of menial work to sustain the family; he could remember the pains his mum had gone.
His dad died intestate and his sibling who should protect the family he left behind became the wolves that devour what he had worked for in his life time.
Olufemi Fasanya
08037257479, 08083906405
www.relationship-daddy.blogspot.com
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