How to move from being a victim to a victor.
I was going through one of the Nigerian dailies recently, and there was an article of a man that was sentenced to death for armed robbery and rape. He disposed two nurses of their valuables in the hospital they were working and raped the younger of them. To the western worlds who are trying to outlaw the capital punishment, these will be called a barbaric judgment; to some, his crime should not have carried such a hash judgment and to many others, he got what he deserved. I really will not pass my judgment on this issue; I believe that he will appeal and his case will get to the Supreme Court that will finally give the last verdict. I am more concerned about how a man can go so low as raping another human; it never cease to amaze me how people can go into these act. However, I have come to a conclusion that the statement, hurting people hurt others, people who have being abused, abuse others is true.
The cry crucify him is a common sound to hear when an ‘abuser’ is caught; everyone seems to want him/her to be hanged on a noose. I feel though that if you hear the story of the abuser you will hear a story that is often than not of someone who has gone through an abuse too. When a person has gone through an abuse, there is a psychological effect on him/her that is far more destructive than the abuse that the person has gone through. The emotional impact is usually destructive; they usually suffer from low self esteem, get angry with the world, blame themselves often time for what happened to them and are often withdrawn. Many of them don’t go for help, but assume that the pain will go away over time since they have being made to believe that wound heal over time. They end up abusing their children, and the abuse continues. Some don’t physically abuse their children in the way they were, but treat them in such a way that the children become negatively psychologically affected by the person who should freely love them.
Can abuse ever end in our world? My answer is a NO. It’ll never end, but you can end it in your family and to people around you by learning how to love and walking in love; love is a powerful medicine that can turn the victim of an abuse to a victor. The question in the mind of someone reading this article will be how can I love the person that has abused me? How can I ever let go of the things that I have gone through? Do you really know how it’s like to go through all that I have gone through in the hand of my abuser? My answer to the last question is I really don’t know how it’s like to be abused, neither have I gone through what you have gone through. But if you will ever make a head long movement in life that will stop your children from becoming an abuser, you have to learn to walk in love.
The kind of love that I am asking you to walk in can’t be achieved by your efforts; it’s possible that you have gone through clinical treatments for a solution to your pain yet have found out that it produced little result. The way to be free comes from allowing the love of God flow in you, and through you to others. Though I haven’t gone through an abuse, but I have gone through an experience that had a negative effect on the way I saw myself for years; my dad was very comfortable at a time in his life time, but after a while became mentally unstable all through his life time. It affected his children in different ways, but for me it gave a low self image effect. My healing began with making a commitment to Jesus, accepting his Lordship over my life and experiencing his love.
One of the mistakes that the abused make is that they turn their back on God and blame Him for not giving them deliverance in the time their abuser was abusing them. God is seen as the enemy instead of the way out; to them, if he loves me why did I have to go through that experience. The truth is that He loves you; He knows your pain and wants you to open the door of your heart instead of shutting Him out. Jesus went through an abuse too, yet He still loves and is interested in anyone who has gone through an abuse experience. He knows how it feels like when it seems that God has forsaken someone despite the clarity of His power. If you ever want to be a victor, you will need to turn your pain, anger and sorrow to Him, because people who have experienced love will give love.
I was going through one of the Nigerian dailies recently, and there was an article of a man that was sentenced to death for armed robbery and rape. He disposed two nurses of their valuables in the hospital they were working and raped the younger of them. To the western worlds who are trying to outlaw the capital punishment, these will be called a barbaric judgment; to some, his crime should not have carried such a hash judgment and to many others, he got what he deserved. I really will not pass my judgment on this issue; I believe that he will appeal and his case will get to the Supreme Court that will finally give the last verdict. I am more concerned about how a man can go so low as raping another human; it never cease to amaze me how people can go into these act. However, I have come to a conclusion that the statement, hurting people hurt others, people who have being abused, abuse others is true.
The cry crucify him is a common sound to hear when an ‘abuser’ is caught; everyone seems to want him/her to be hanged on a noose. I feel though that if you hear the story of the abuser you will hear a story that is often than not of someone who has gone through an abuse too. When a person has gone through an abuse, there is a psychological effect on him/her that is far more destructive than the abuse that the person has gone through. The emotional impact is usually destructive; they usually suffer from low self esteem, get angry with the world, blame themselves often time for what happened to them and are often withdrawn. Many of them don’t go for help, but assume that the pain will go away over time since they have being made to believe that wound heal over time. They end up abusing their children, and the abuse continues. Some don’t physically abuse their children in the way they were, but treat them in such a way that the children become negatively psychologically affected by the person who should freely love them.
Can abuse ever end in our world? My answer is a NO. It’ll never end, but you can end it in your family and to people around you by learning how to love and walking in love; love is a powerful medicine that can turn the victim of an abuse to a victor. The question in the mind of someone reading this article will be how can I love the person that has abused me? How can I ever let go of the things that I have gone through? Do you really know how it’s like to go through all that I have gone through in the hand of my abuser? My answer to the last question is I really don’t know how it’s like to be abused, neither have I gone through what you have gone through. But if you will ever make a head long movement in life that will stop your children from becoming an abuser, you have to learn to walk in love.
The kind of love that I am asking you to walk in can’t be achieved by your efforts; it’s possible that you have gone through clinical treatments for a solution to your pain yet have found out that it produced little result. The way to be free comes from allowing the love of God flow in you, and through you to others. Though I haven’t gone through an abuse, but I have gone through an experience that had a negative effect on the way I saw myself for years; my dad was very comfortable at a time in his life time, but after a while became mentally unstable all through his life time. It affected his children in different ways, but for me it gave a low self image effect. My healing began with making a commitment to Jesus, accepting his Lordship over my life and experiencing his love.
One of the mistakes that the abused make is that they turn their back on God and blame Him for not giving them deliverance in the time their abuser was abusing them. God is seen as the enemy instead of the way out; to them, if he loves me why did I have to go through that experience. The truth is that He loves you; He knows your pain and wants you to open the door of your heart instead of shutting Him out. Jesus went through an abuse too, yet He still loves and is interested in anyone who has gone through an abuse experience. He knows how it feels like when it seems that God has forsaken someone despite the clarity of His power. If you ever want to be a victor, you will need to turn your pain, anger and sorrow to Him, because people who have experienced love will give love.
Femi Fasanya
08037257479, 08083906405
